If only I had known.
Time would pass and this vow would end up landing me in credit card debt. As a young college student, appearance was everything and I simply had to fit in. I would fill closets full of clothes in attempt to soothe a wound, but the scab continually ripped open. Debt mounted and nothing got better.
One day, a tiny babe was born into my arms and I was determined to make up for it all. We never left home without a darling little bow and the latest outfit from the most expensive of stores. I refused all second-hand clothes and store brand varieties. I simply would not let my children suffer the same pain. Granted, I had no idea the root of this apparent “snotty” behavior, but in my mind, we could only buy the best.
If only I had known.
One day the money ran out and I simply had no choice. I had read about how frugal shoppers had gotten fabulous deals on great clothes at yard sales and consignment sales and I knew I needed to make a change. I set a date to go to a yard sale and I prayed that God would show me that it was worth my time and effort. Of course, He did not fail to show off. That day I found so many useful items for my family. None of which had holes. It took quite some time to let go of the trauma that I had ingrained in my head. Little-by-little God graciously healed wounds and showed Himself faithful. Our clothes became blessing whether they had tags or not. Stains and rips were easily overlooked.
Until recently when someone told me that I needed to get a real job so that I could have more than two pairs of pants. The comment brought back a flood of feelings over all that I had believed as a young girl. I wondered why this person would say such a thing until I realized that I only had two pairs of pants. Actually, I have one pair of pants and one skirt. I’ve got a handful of shirts, most of which have holes. My kids wear all second hand clothes and most of them are stained or bear holes. I may have been better off back at Kathy’s Kloset.
But now I know.
Clothing is actually not as much of a “need” as I used to claim it to be. I’ve come to see that clothing is rather irrelevant in the scheme of things. Where I used to think that my appearance mattered, I’ve learned that the people who are interested in judging me for what I wear are the exact people that I’m better off not developing a friendship with anyway. Oh, to have learned that as a young girl. Imagine the heartache and money that I could have saved. Plus, there are millions of people on this earth that would be thrilled to have as much as I have. I’m truly wealthy.
Even, if I have to wear the same skirt and brown pants everyday for the rest of my life- who cares? This life is but a vapor and I want everything I have to go toward the love and care of these precious souls, who one day will be called to the same mission: serving and honoring Christ in the days and moments that He gives us.
Kim Sorgius
Kim is just a girl, crazy in love with Jesus. She's a single mother of 4, a passionate homeschooler and life-long student. After teaching 8 years in public school, she traded her M.A. in Early Childhood for sippy cups and homeschool co-ops. Kim is the owner and editor of The Homeschool Village and Not Consumed where she encourages others to rest victoriously in the hands of God, rather than allowing life's difficult circumstances to consume.
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Amen!
Amen, dear sweet lady. To God be the glory.
Kim, I can relate all too well. Many of my clothes came from Kathy’s Kloset as well or for a special “treat” Family Dollar. After I was on my own I was very concerned with buying things new and also racked up some credit card debt in college with an extremely high interest rate. As I got older I learned that what I wore wasn’t as important as who I am. In my closet now there are actually a few things from high school and I pretty sure 2 of them are from Kathy’s Kloset. Enjoy reading your blog.
When I first started reading your comment I thought you were being figurative when you said that you shopped at Kathy’s Kloset. Then I saw your email address and realized that you really did shop there! If only we had known this about each other back then… so silly to think we are the only ones! Bless you, friend!
Can you actually WEAR the clothes from high school? Don’t answer that.
What an awful thing to say to a person. No matter where you are, there are always insecure or unknowing people around you. I remember back before I found the joys of consignment (back when I was in debt!)-I was shopping the clearance rack at a store in the mall. I overheard two teen girls talking and one of them said “I would never be caught dead wearing something off a clearance rack.” Ouch-away I went ashamed. Now I am proud of my consignment finds and tell all my friends when they compliment something I wear. After all, it’s cool to be “green” now-haha. I have more than enough “dress up” clothes, but the one or two pair of pants I wear on a regular basis I like to call my “off duty uniform.” HA! I am blessed to have friends that love me because of that and all the other things I am, like you said-we’re better off without those who judge us. I just pray God gives me enough wisdom to never judge someone else about anything else just because of my own ignorance. Thank you for your wonderful and thought-provoking posts!
Sweet friend, I’ll walk beside you in the same pair of pants and skirt….like you…the money came and went…it evaporates quickly…just like the clothes that come into and go out of style- Love you dearly…and btw…I love that skirt you wore in Greenville….it is beautiful
Good…you’ll see it again!
Hi Kim! First time commenter here. I just found your blog a few weeks ago, but I’ve already read and related to so many of your posts. Growing up, I recall always feeling a little self conscious wearing the ‘lesser’ brand than my friends or having a smaller variety to choose from, but luckily I was surrounded by friends who didn’t care and were willing to share.
Now that I’m in my mid-twenties and about to get married (10 days!), I’m surprised at how frugal I’ve become….almost all of my friends are the same way too. We scout for deals, frequent second hand stores, and do clothing swaps between us. I think I’ve finally reached a comfortable balance between having a few, select nice things and realizing that those nice things don’t own me or define me. And to quote my mom, “ya can’t take it with ya”. God bless!
Beautiful as always! Thanks for always sharing your heart.
I can totally relate. Thank God for you
I too grew up in poverty with second hand clothing.
As an adult though, I have never been into fashion, so I guessed that has helped me. Even though I can afford to buy clothing, if I choose to, I prefer to wear the same old type of clothing day in and day out anyway.
We have this abundance and we don’t even know it.
)
Yes I can relate to this story. I am drowning in credit card debt trying to keep up but no longer. Thank you for sharing.
Thank you for sharing this, Kim! I am very much a minimalist when it comes to clothes and appreciate your insight.
My grandfather had TB and was in a sanitarium for much of my mother’s life. All her clothes came from the used clothes store. In her senior year (in the early 50s) she was voted best dressed in her senior class. I grew up with the opposite view–it was fun to see what could be remade from “used” clothing. I look at others closets and wonder why they need such a large one for!
yeah for growing up in Him and having eyes to see what really matters!
So glad I ran across this post and your blog. I am stunned that a person would actually say to another that they should get a job so they could have more than two pairs of pants! How cruel. Your post helped remind me of what is really important in our lives. This subject is something that I have written about, grained ground and honestly struggled with from time to time. This week being a “struggle” as I too have two pairs of jeans
but i’m incredibly blessed with family love, and working for the kingdom in my family. My purpose is greater than money to buy clothing.
Many blessings to you.
Shannon