How I Became #NotConsumed
For the most recent updates on Luke, scroll to the bottom of the post.
Whether you’ve landed on this blog for the very first time today or been reading along for five years, you might not know the story behind it all. So, may I tell you?
The year was 2011. From my spot on the couch the blessings were overwhelming. God had provided a place for us to live despite a foreclosure, impending/unwanted divorce, and deep sorrow that rarely found words adequate. I felt so very grateful and yet so afraid. The road ahead of me was long and promised loneliness, sleeplessness, and great uncertainty.
The silence in that moment was deafening. My four children (ages 1, 3, 6, and 7) were all sleeping soundly and it was more than I could handle. The tears began to flow and my heart cried out for help, “Oh God, what do you want me to do?”
I knew it was only a matter of time before I had to find some kind of work. I had paid a year of rent in advance by selling literally every possession we had, but after this year there would be nothing to sell. I trusted God fully to provide; my cries weren’t of unbelief, but of a desire to know what direction I should pursue. I knew it was likely I would need employment as part of God’s plan. I just didn’t know how, when, or what I should do about it.
The idea of starting a blog had been tossed around and prayed over, but I didn’t have a clear answer. In that moment I found myself asking God again to show me what He would have me do. I looked back down at my Bible and began to read again. I can’t tell you why I was reading Lamentations. Maybe I was just wanting to lament and felt comfortable doing it with those very words. Maybe it was God’s leading. Either way, the words of the third chapter fell on my soul like a warm blanket on a restless baby.
Because of the Lord’s great mercies… we would not be consumed.
What a hope and promise. What a future we had because God’s compassion would never fail us. That night I texted my friend what God had finally revealed in my heart. I would indeed blog and the name of the blog would be “Not Consumed.” Although I had no idea how to start a blog and honestly felt inept with even small technology tasks like checking email, I believed God would one day provide through this blog.
I knew that day our circumstances were far from over. I knew I’d have to continue to trust God in ways unfathomable to me. I knew that someday God would use this pain that we couldn’t escape to bless others with the same promise of not being consumed by their circumstances. But I’ll be honest. There was a lot I didn’t know.
I didn’t know then I’d be sitting in an oncology clinic many years later with my baby, clinging to the very same promises. I didn’t know how precious the words of Lamentations 3:22-23 would become to me and how easily they would flow from our lips in even the smallest of trials. I didn’t know those words and that phrase (#NotConsumed) would literally become the very breath of God poured into our hearts.
#NotConsumed Meets Cancer
Barely over a month ago God changed our lives forever. (Read the whole story here.) It was an ordinary day and I had my usual wardrobe planned. #NotConsumed T-shirt, yoga pants, and flip flops. I had to drop off the girls, but other than that, I was planning to be home sitting behind a computer for most of the day. When the pain in Luke’s head suddenly became an emergency, changing my shirt was the last thing on my mind. That one thing would end up becoming the most valuable thing.
When they told me it was a tumor, I looked down to see those words. #NotConsumed
When they showed me the images on the MRI and told us of the dangers of the surgery, those words brought peace into my heart. #NotConsumed
When we were readmitted several times for complications, the shirt became a tool to remind me of the truth. #NotConsumed
When they said it would be a year of chemo, the message of God’s unending faithfulness blared across my chest. #NotConsumed
In fact, I’m glad I have a few colors because I think this shirt will follow us into every clinic visit, hospital stay, and chemo treatment for a long time. Not because the shirt has special powers or changes the outcome of anything we do. Because it reminds me to stay focused on the truth.
We are #NotConsumed by cancer and anything and everything else. It will always be true. No circumstance, situation, trial, will ever consume us. That’s a promise. And isn’t it beautiful? Isn’t that what you want to remember when things are hard?
I know I do. It’s my natural tendency to think that I can’t handle it. That the situation is out of control. Or that the circumstances are so overwhelming there’s no reasonable resolution or action on my part.
The funny thing is–all of that is true. I’m not in control. I can’t handle the situation. And there’s really nothing I can do. Nothing aside from trust God, the One who does control the situation and the One who can handle any and every circumstance. The One who’s not surprised or playing catch-up. The One who has a plan that is ONLY and always good.
As we’ve frequented the ER, hospital rooms, and facilities, I’ve become known for my shirt and I love it. It provides an opportunity for conversation, which is an open door for witnessing both to medical staff and other patients we come into contact with. But even if that were not true, the promise it holds for us is one worth wearing.
Today was one of those days. When Dr. Bryant walked into the room, she smiled and said, “I see you are becoming rather fond of that shirt.” All I could do was smile back and bask in the graciousness of such a good God. As we sat and discussed results, made chemo plans, and talked through side effects there wasn’t a moment of doubt that our family was #NotConsumed. Today. Next week. Years from now. Always.
One Year Update (Nov. 2017)
If you’ve been following our journey in our Facebook group you know that it’s now been a year since Luke was diagnosed. God has been so gracious. Luke has kept most of his hair and experienced minimal side effects considering the possibilities. We so appreciate your prayers for the last several months of chemo, the future of the tumor (which is not growing, but not removable), and the neuropathy in his legs.
Luke’s sweet spirit has blessed so many nurses, doctors, our family and even the readers of #NotConsumed. We are so very grateful for every single prayer sent on our behalf. It’s a HUGE thing to do and we are blessed by you.
God is only and ALWAYS good. I know that whatever you are facing right now may seem difficult, but His promises remain true. You are #NotConsumed because of HIS great love and unending mercies! (Lam. 3:22-23)
One year OFF Chemo Update (Sept. 2019)
This picture says it all. This is Luke’s oncologist. She’s tough but laid back. She’s hilarious, the absolute best in her field, and she loves him to pieces. Words could never adequately describe how thankful we are to have her.
This week’s MRI is showing a small regrowth of Luke’s tumor. At this point, it’s not substantial enough to change anything, but something we need to watch closely and plan for. We would love for you to join us in prayer that it stays that way.
We are also going to see a neurologist to try and get more help with his headaches as they seem to be the biggest issue for him right now.
Two Years OFF Chemo Update (Sept. 2020)
This week we got our official “STABLE” report from the oncologist. Woohoo! There is still that bit of tumor growth that they saw a year ago, but that growth has been stable (unchanged) since September 2019.
Headaches are also now completely under control. There is a good bit of medicine in play to make this happen, which I don’t love, but I’m thankful that something is working.
Hypothalamic issues seem to be the biggest pest right now. He’s gained another 15 pounds since May and there are several labs that came back with abnormal levels. Please pray as we determine what steps need to be done to help with this.
CHEMO ROUND 2 (March 2022 Update)
In May of 2021, we got the bad news that Luke’s tumor was again growing. We are thankful for the break from chemo, but not surprised by this news since the tumor is aggressive and grows in juvenile cells. Luke started oral chemo in June of 2021 and has been stable since that time. His hypothalamic issues remain. So far the oral chemo is keeping the tumor from growing, but sadly, it’s not shrinking. For now we wait on the Lord to show us what’s next.
Chemo continued (June 2023 update)
We’ve now been on oral chemo for about two years. The tumor remains stable. It’s still there, but not growing. I asked Dr. Bryant how long we’d continue like this and she said, “At least for now.” So we wait and see what God will do. The chemo doesn’t have many obvious symptoms aside from some toe pain that ends up looking like ingrown toenails and some skin rashes. Luke still has metabolic issues from his original rounds of chemo and the tumor removal which includes hypothalamic dysfunction leading to excessive weight gain. We are working to try and combat those.
Through practical tools & Bible-based resources, Kim Sorgius is dedicated to helping your family GROW in faith so you can be Not Consumed by life’s struggles. Author of popular kid’s devotional Bible studies and practical homeschooling tools, Kim has a master’s degree in education and curriculum design coupled with over 2 decades of experience working with kids and teens. Above all, her most treasured job is mother and homeschool teacher of four amazing kiddos.
Thank you for sharing this heartfelt message. Keeping you and the family in my thoughts and prayers while knowing the Lord is able to carry you through. Looking to order my shirt.. #notconsumed.
God bless you all! I can’t imagine all that you have been through and are going through; but God is always good and works even the hardest of circumstances for His good. Our prayers ring out with yours and all those praying for this precious child made in God’s image.
Shelley
What an incredible encouragement and testimony of God’s faithfulness and the reminder to press into Him All. The. Time.
Thank you for sharing, I am certainly praying! xx
Dear Kim, it is well with you! God will continue to give you the strength you need every single day! You’re an incredibly strong woman. God bless you and your family in Jesus name. Amen
Keeping you, Luke, and your family in my prayers. Thank you so much for testifying to God’s faithfulness in a place (online) where it can bless so many others.
Kim, I too am a mom of a childhood cancer kiddo. My son, Jaxon, was diagnosed with Stage 4 Wilms Tumor at the age of 5. Today, at the age of 9, he is 3 years cancer free and with the exception of a little neuropathy pain, he is a normal 9 year old. Hang in there! Feel free to contact me if you want to talk to a mom who knows what you are going through.
Thank you for your encouragement. My friend has a daughter with a Wilms Tumor. Diagnosed at 2, now age 11. She is also cancer free and holding!
Thank you for sharing so much of your heart, Kim. I’m a big fan of your blog. I recently started Not my Brothers Keeper with my son (8 yrs) and daughter (4 yrs)…we love it!! It has made for some great conversations with our children. Thank you!!
We will keep Luke and your family in our prayers. My niece was diagnosed with Wilms Tumor at the age of 2, she is now 4 1/2 and the cancer spread from her kidney to her lungs. After aggressive treatments we received word that she is officially cancer free, but has to do maintenance chemo for the next year or so. We are believing that God will continue to increase our faith and allow us to be #notconsumed.
This brought tears to my eyes but then I could see you smilling through the trials and my prayer for you is to come out of this trying time laughing!
My hugs to your baby, he will be a testmony of God s healing power.
Stay strong Mama.
I will be praying for you, Luke and your family. I too spent last year in the oncology ward at the children’s hospital. Looking back, there were so many unknowns, so much questioning God and wishing I could take all this away. Today I can say with confidence that the experience I had has forever changed me. Not only has it drawn me closer to God, it has given me a very different outlook on life. There is not one thing that happens to us that does not go through God first!
So true! Praying for you, Tammi!
Praying for you and for Luke’s full recovery!! What an encouragement you are to so many of us – through your blog and through your testimony! May the Lord return 10-fold to you the blessing you are to all of us!
Ione Wise
🙂
Thank you for sharing your courage as a family. My son also(Jordan 10) had surgery today, but no where close to the magnitude that your little Luck went through. How your words have given me courage to stay #not consumed in times of struggling and to always let the light of God shine through the darkness. We will be praying for healing for Luke and for peace and strength for your family.
Thank you. Hope your son had a speedy recovery!
Kim,
Like Laura above, I too am a momcologist –a mom of a cancer patient (part mom, part oncologist). My daughter was diagnosed in 2011 with ALL (leukemia) and went through almost three years of chemo at St. Jude. She was almost three tans now is W very happy 8 year old. Many prayers for you as you start this journey. As Tammi shares it will change you and shape who you and Luke become. Thanks for sharing with us.
Thank you. Prayers for you as well!
Amen!! Thank you for your sincere, beautiful words straight from the heart. God is using you to encourage others in ways you cannot imagine. Praying for you all. Love.
Praying for your family.
Thank you for sharing. I will be praying for you, Luke and your family!
Kim, thank you for your faithfulness to the Lord. Your testimony is touching and will touch many for the honor and glory of our great God. We will keep you, Luke, your family and the doctors in our prayers. Love in Christ, The Harrison’s
Wow! What would we do if we did not have a very caring God to turn to?? Thank you for sharing! Praying for all of your family! God Bless You! And have a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!
I’m praying for you, your son, and your family. May God continue to bless, and keep you as you pursue Him. Thank you for sharing, this has blessed me, and I look forward to wearing a t-shirt in honor of your family.
Gods ways are not our ways, and His thoughts are not our thoughts! Those are the words that got me through eight years of medical issues with one of my children. I pray that the Lord will comfort you and your children with His peace that passes all understanding. Recently I ordered several items from you, and one of those items was the JOY cards – what a blessing! It’s finally helping our children to focus outwardly instead of inwardly. And the simplicity of them is fantastic!
Thank you for your kind words and prayers. I’m so glad you like the prayer cards!
Praying for you during these trials!
I John 5:4
Faith is the victory that overcomes the world!
I’m praying for you, your son, and your family.There is not one thing that happens to us that does not go through God first!
Kim,
I admire your courage and boldness through it all. We do have a GOOD God and His promises are YES and Amen. Praying for a speedy and miraculous recovery over Luke and may you experience more of God’s goodness. Thank you for sharing !
Thank you for sharing your beautiful faith and testimony. It has been a blessing for me. Keeping you, Luke and your family in my prayers.
I feel speechless as I wipe the tears off my face. Your heart shines lighthouse beams.
Every single day, what you do, matters.
Praying for your family and you! Thank you for sharing you experience, it is so encouraging.
Keep on trusting in God’s promises!!
Regards from Spain 😀
Praying so earnestly over sweet Luke. I don’t even have the words….
<3
I’m sorry your Family has to go through this. When my Mom was doing Chemo, she took Centime Vitamin everyday. I helped her not to get sick. And she said boiled Shrimp will get that taste out of her mouth. Just something that might work.
Remember God does not give us more than we can handle.
My prayers go to you and your little boy. You are an amazing Mom, who has faced many challenges. Your positive and go-getter attitude will be one the most important aids to help you through this time. The Lord will do the rest…
Praying for you. I’m gonna have to get one of those shirts.
Side note – A few years ago when my daughter broke her arm, there were no “normal” rooms open, so we were sent to the same hall which you pictured in one of your other posts. Though we were stressed about my daughter’s arm and following surgery, we realized that we had much to be thankful for.
Thank you for sharing with us as you go through this trial. I appreciate so much what I have learned from you.
Oh dear Kim —I’m still praying for you. 2 Cor 1:11. May you be blessed in ALL of your times —smooth times and hard times–oh how He loves ? You! ☝️?☝️
Will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers.
Marilyn
I’ve been following your blog for a long time, Kim. Your transparency is amazing! What a precious gift ?. Keep on…keeping on. Praying for you and your dear kiddos this morning. To ourAwesome God be the glory! Thank you for all you do! ?☝️☝️❤️