“Spiritual disciplines? What are those?” I wondered. I had grown up going to church and knowing all the church things. But the summer after my junior year of high school was the first time I had realized having a relationship with God required effort on my part!

Sure, I knew I should read my Bible—I rarely missed a day! I prayed when I was worried or scared or excited. But I hadn’t really grown spiritually in the 10+ years I had been a Christian. God’s Word was still more confusing than it was understandable. If nothing was going wrong in my life I didn’t think about God very much at all. I was thankful to be saved from my sin and happy to attend church, and that was about as much change as my life had seen.

Why Spiritual Disciplines Matter

Maybe you’ve felt concerned about your kids being in the same situation that I was in. You wonder if they truly understand the power of the Gospel to change their lives. You try to have spiritually impactful conversations with them but they have little or nothing to say.

Our child’s salvation is a huge reason to rejoice and get excited, but the truth is that the work has only begun! Salvation restores a relationship with God that we have the responsibility of growing. It’s this intentional effort that results in spiritual growth! So how can we help our kids grow spiritually and have a thriving relationship with their God?

5 Spiritual Disciplines to Help Your Kids Grow

1) The Spiritual Discipline of Prayer

I’m sure you already know prayer is important for us as well as our kids. Yet it’s still probably one of the most under-utilized privileges we as Christians have! The God of the universe tells us to come boldly to Him with our requests while promising to hear and answer. So why don’t we come to Him?

One reason our kids don’t go to God in prayer is that they simply don’t know how! Remember, Jesus had to teach His disciples to pray, so it’s not surprising that we would need to teach our kids to pray. Whether it’s figuring out the right words or deciding whether or not they should even pray about certain things, our kids face a ton of questions connected to prayer that can be really overwhelming. In fact, they may not know whether they should start their prayer with “Dear Jesus” or “Dear Father.” Does it count if they don’t say “in Jesus’ name” but they do say “amen”?

Prayer isn’t just something we’re supposed to do—it’s part of seeking God’s will and aligning our desires with His! Through prayer, we lay our burdens down at the feet of Jesus and exercise our faith that God will work all things together for good in our lives. If our kids can get this, it will change their lives!

2) The Spiritual Discipline of Devotional Time with God

Most Christians would agree that we need to be spending time with God. So why is it that so few of us actually manage to do it? We roll out of bed in the morning, and before we know it, we’re swept away by the busyness of the day. When we finally fall into bed at night, the last thing we want to do is put the mental effort into intentional devotional time! If we struggle with this, how do we even begin to help our kids develop their own quiet time rhythm?

The answer is not a magical formula that will immediately solve all your kids’ quiet time woes, but it is the truth: they have to plan 1) what they’re going to do and then 2) set aside the time to do it! This is how they established all the habits they have. Something intentional like quiet time with the Lord requires a special level of attention and discipline that doesn’t come as easily as brushing your teeth before bed or removing your shoes at the front door.

When it comes to what they’re going to do, Bible studies for kids are a GREAT place to start! Through carefully written and doctrinally sound Bible studies, your kids can start to learn how to approach Scripture and understand its meaning. Then, as they grow and begin to desire something a little more independent, you can help them learn to develop their own quiet time! Then, they can choose a consistent time every day to devote to God. Whether it’s 15 minutes after breakfast or 10 minutes after dinner, linking this time to another consistent part of their day can help them stay faithful in maintaining their quiet time!

3) The Spiritual Discipline of Diving Deeper into Scripture

As our kids develop their quiet time with the Lord, they’ll also need to learn how to study the Bible! This may seem like common sense, yet so many kids have no idea how to study their Bibles. They read a passage and interpret it from the lens of a sermon they’ve heard or based on what a camp counselor said. But they never make it deeper than what others have told them. This is a MAJOR problem!

As Christians, we have the Holy Spirit in our hearts. It is this Spirit Who helps us understand and apply God’s Word to our lives. While preaching and teaching from others does help us learn more about God and how to obey Him, we also need to be digging into God’s Word ourselves. As we do, God’s Spirit will show us how our hearts and lives should change so that we grow spiritually and reflect our God more perfectly.

Pursuing truth through a personal study of God’s Word requires patience and hard work! Sometimes we need to read a passage multiple times, look up definitions, research the context, make notes, and then make even more notes. Though it is time-consuming, diving deeply into God’s Word is also immeasurably rewarding. If we want our kids to grow in their relationship with God, we need to help them learn how to seek Him!

4) The Spiritual Discipline of Sharing the Gospel

I grew up passing out tracts at the grocery store and knocking on doors to invite people to church. I believed these things were all I needed to do in order to be making disciples. While passing out tracts or invitations to church is good and can definitely be used by God, making disciples involves so much more!

When God saves us, He changes our lives so that WE are the tract. WE are ambassadors of Christ who get to share His love and shine His light into the lives of those around us. In order to obey God’s command to make disciples, we don’t just witness to people. We invite them into our homes and meet them at the park. We take them meals when they’re sick, and pray for them when they’re fearful. Through these relationships that we develop in the daily rhythms of our lives, we have the opportunity not just to tell people about Jesus, but to show them Jesus!

This can be tricky for our kids to fully embrace. They’re going to have to get on board with sometimes needing to lovingly speak the truth to their friends. They’ll have to graciously refuse to participate in behavior or speech that goes against their God. But much more often, they’ll be in positions to befriend the lonely, speak love to the bullied, and act kindly towards the hateful. They’ll be asked “why?” and they’ll get to explain the change Jesus has caused in their hearts and lives. As they live out the truth and love those around them, they’ll be making disciples just as Jesus has called them to do.

5) The Spiritual Discipline of Biblical Stewardship

While it might not be formally recognized as a “spiritual discipline,” stewardship is a crucial part of growing spiritually. It is the discipline of submitting everything you have—your possessions, intelligence, time, abilities, and entire life—to the mission Christians have been called to! Jesus literally redeemed and bought back our lives from sin and death through His sacrifice. He owns us and everything we have, and this truth must be reflected in how we live.

I don’t know about you, but I know that as a kid I did not realize just how much God had graciously given to me. Maybe you’ve even noticed a lack of gratitude towards God in your own kids’ lives recently. While this is fairly normal, it’s not okay! The ability to look at everything they have—their talents, abilities, possessions, treasures, and even their life—and recognize it as a good gift from God is critical to their ability to live their life on mission for Christ. Our kids won’t grow spiritually if they’re wasting what God has given them. They’ll be missing the point if they’re continually looking to what they “own” to satisfy them. They will never be able to make sacrifices and submit their desires to God if they’re holding onto THINGS they believe they deserve to have.

In order to grow spiritually, our kids need to recognize that everything they have is a good gift from God. But there’s a lot more to this mindset than just knowing it’s true. It needs to sink deep into their hearts and minds until it results in changed actions. As they follow God’s purpose for their lives and possessions, they will grow into faithful servants who will hear the words “well done” someday when they enter heaven.

Where to Find Help to Grow

Does this list feel overwhelming to you? Maybe you’re thinking that helping your kids grow in all these areas is just impossible! Don’t stress—we want to help.

This is why we have written the Spiritual Disciplines Series! It consists of five studies: Amen!, Developing a Quiet Time, Seek Him, Shine, and Well Done. Each of these studies examines Scripture carefully and applies it practically in order to teach your kids all about these spiritual disciplines that will help them grow their relationship with God!

The purpose of our lives is to become more like Christ as we seek a deeper relationship with God. Help your kids understand this now and GROW spiritually!