I’m sorry to inform you that there is no freedom of speech here. Well, actually I’m not even sorry. But don’t worry. It’s not my goal to restrict you. It’s my goal to help you change your heart. You see, I desire most to help you grow in Christ and I’ve learned the hard way that what you say is actually VERY IMPORTANT.
In Matthew 15:18, Jesus says, “But what comes out of the mouth proceeds from the heart, and this defiles a person.”
Did you catch that? What comes out of your mouth is actually a reflection of what is in your heart. This verse was spoken by Jesus when the Pharisees were questioning Him regarding the practices of the disciples. Just before this verse He says, “it is not what goes into the mouth that defiles a person, but what comes out of the mouth; this defiles a person.”
So you can see that our words are very important. What we say holds tremendous power. It shows the world who we really are inside and it actually defines our character.
That can be a scary thought if you consider what has come out of our mouths over even the past few days, much less our lifetime. Were our words truth? Did they show our love for God or our love for self? When people hear us talk, do they see hatred, discontent, or selfishness?
It’s my privilege to be your mother and I’ve loved watching you grow in Christ. This is why I’m certain that you don’t want your words to defile you. So, I’m making an official list for you to use as a reference. These are phrases that are forbidden in our home because of the message they send to others and/or the discontentment they harbor in our hearts.
5 Phrases That Are Forbidden in Our Home
“It’s not fair!”
I could go on and on about this phrase, but let’s focus on one truth. The Bible says that God is working all things for our good. It says that He is always good. Therefore, we don’t even need to evaluate things on this level. There is no such thing as fair; it’s all God’s work in our lives.
While it might not appear to be good to us or even seems to be harming us, we MUST trust God’s goodness and His love for us in every situation.
Oh and if you want to talk about fair, let’s not forget about that which we actually deserve. (Romans 3:23 and 6:23)
First, let’s assume this phrase is being used to describe a person. Have you ever called someone stupid? I know you have. I’ve heard it. But do you realize what you are really doing?
Take a peek at Psalm 139. This passage tells us how amazingly wonderful we were made. It tells us that God formed us in His very image. Of course you know that this passage wasn’t written for just you. It’s true for all people, right? Uh oh. Now we have a problem don’t we? If we call someone else stupid, we are personally insulting the work of God.
That’s something we definitely don’t want to be guilty of, right?
This one might be a little confusing, but stick with me. Most of the time when people utter these words, what they really mean is, “I’m sorry I got caught” or “I’m sorry that you are bothered.” Truthfully, that’s not really what an apology is all about. So that’s why these words are forbidden.
If you wrong someone, God tells us to seek forgiveness. Not utter a lousy phrase. Seeking forgiveness sounds a little more like this, “Sister, I should not have pulled your hair. It was wrong. Will you please forgive me?” You can say I’m sorry in this type of a conversation, too. But saying I’m sorry on its own simply won’t cut it.
“Finders keepers, losers weepers”
I seriously hope that I don’t even have to explain this one to you. But I will just in case. Finding something doesn’t EVER, ever make it yours. You must always make an effort to return it to its rightful owner. And no, I don’t mean that you should glance around and if you don’t see anyone just slip it in your pocket and run. That’s called stealing.
If you truly find something that can not be returned to its owner, we should consider donating it. But I know that this is not usually the case. Typically it’s $1 that was found in your brother’s pants while putting them in the laundry. Give it back. Trust me, it’s worth being honest over this.
“It’s his fault”
As you know, this one makes mom rather unhappy. There is nothing more difficult to deal with than a person who is unwilling to consider the part that they played in a problem. Please remember this truth===> you can ALWAYS do something to make a situation better. Even if that something is just to walk away.
No, it’s not your brother’s fault that you hit him because he hit you first. No, it’s not your sister’s fault that you spilled the milk because she was singing an annoying song. Even as a child, you are responsible for your own behavior. Now is the time to understand that you must have a right response when others do something wrong to you.
And no matter what happens, you are always held accountable for your behavior. There is never an acceptable excuse for harming another with words, actions, or fists.
Well dear children, that’s all for today. I’m sure there are other phrases that we need to remove from our vocabulary completely. But for now, let’s work on these and remember that our words can defile us as they show the ugly that is really in our hearts. Let’s take the time to read God’s Word every day so we can grow closer to Him and farther from the ugliness of sin!
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